Last week, something very exciting happened to me.
This was something I’d been wishing for quite a long time — years even!
I got accepted to give a TEDx talk here in Raleigh this November.
(Okay, I also had a son last week which was exciting, but let’s stay focused on the big things.)
Four years ago, I was sitting in the dining area of a Hampton Inn outside of Kansas City with my business coach/mentor David. We were discussing my dreams and goals and the obstacles (internal and external) that stood in their way.
We’d been at it for hours when we gave everything a top-down look to analyze deeper.
I knew that I wanted to start public speaking professionally. I felt like it could lead to other work for my video production company and I also thought I had unique ideas worth sharing.
Under my speaking goals list, I listed “give a TEDx talk” as one of the goals.
If you’re unfamiliar, TED is a Silicon-valley based conference (Technology, Entertainment, and Design) where they host 18 minute speeches from thought leaders that consist of unique “ideas worth spreading.”
TED talks have launched the careers of many people (including my hero Brené Brown). They’ve become so ubiquitous there’s a popular meme where after you post a strong point or opinion online, you cap it off with “Thank you for coming to my TED talk.”
TEDx events are similar TED-like talks, but more locally focused. TED’s leader Chris Anderson says, “Officially, the ‘x’ stands for independently organized TED event — but it’s more of a TED multiplied.”
Because people like Brené have done TED talks, and people even closer to my level in my career have done TEDx talks, I wanted to do one, too.
When David and I were combing through all the line items to discuss in further details, David paused when he saw “TEDx talk” and asked the ever-important and sometimes triggering question, “Why?”
“What do you mean?” I asked defensively. “I would just love to do it.”
Let’s be honest. I had no reason other than my ego and the stamp of approval I thought those letters TEDx gave it. My other speaking goals were more based on my previous work and the skills that I had acquired. This one stuck out like a sore thumb.
“There are plenty of other places to speak that are more aligned with your business and your other goals. TEDx is nice, but it’s not needed to be a professional speaker.” He said.
He was right. So I let it go.
I went on to speak for national and international organizations, sometimes getting paid as much as five figures.
I built a business around my speaking topics and storytelling ideas.
I found all kinds of ways to make speaking my business. I didn’t stress about public acclaim. I focused on my audience and spreading my ideas.
But let’s be real. I didn’t give up on the dream.
I applied for different TEDx talks around the state and country each year. Sometimes multiple.
However, when I’d applied in the past, I always proposed some talk that I thought would get accepted or that they’d like. Again, I was driven by my ego. I just wanted the stamp.
But this year, I have been pondering and exploring one idea for months that I’ve just touched on but never really dove into or written about at length. It’s been stuck in my head and dominating my thoughts. I can’t shake it and I want to shout it from the rooftops.
That’s what I pitched them.
Because that one, a thought that had been permeating through my mind and changed my perspective on the world, was actually an idea worth spreading.
And that’s what they accepted.
It’s one of life’s oldest and cruelest tricks that when you let go of the desire for something, it seems to come to you more freely. I didn’t need TEDx anymore, so I applied with confidence.
That, and the fact that my genuine desire to discuss an idea and share it with people took precedence over my desire to be on stage and be seen, allowed me to accomplish this dream.
And I hope on the night of November 7th, I can meet you after the show and say, “Thank you for coming to my TED(x) talk.”
Rain Bennett is a two-time Emmy-nominated filmmaker, writer, and competitive storyteller with over a decade of experience producing documentary films that focus on health and wellness. His mission is simple: to make the world happier and healthier by sharing stories of change.
You can read the rest of “Right as Rain” here, and check back every Wednesday on Chapelboro for a new column!
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