There’s a gradual entry to the neighborhood pool where the littlest kids play, and I like to stand in the water up to my shins and cool off, even though I suspect someone is peeing in close proximity. I heard a rumor that the water has been treated with a chemical that turns green with the presence of urine. Such a product may exist, but I am not in favor of public shaming. I may be of the minority opinion.
I have a friend who threatens to sneak green dye into the water behind the boy flirting with her teenage daughter. Perhaps I’ll figure out a way to do the same when my girl reaches that age.
I found parenting more physically demanding when the kids were young. Urine, I mean, you’re in the water with them all the time, and when it’s time to go, you have to haul them out. They can’t be left alone or they might well drink the water, which is not good for them. They grow up and become strong swimmers and are much more independent in all kinds of ways. You don’t have your eyes on them for long stretches of the day, and perhaps they will sneak off to drink other beverages that are also not good for them.
Of course, tragedy can occur at any age, but I felt more in control when my kids were splashing around in the shallows. Now, my oldest is about to dive into the deep end of high school. I trust him. And yet, as my friend with the green food coloring plan says, “There’s so much out there!” When she says, “out there,” she gestures in wide circles with her hands, kind of like she is swimming.
We are all trying to keep our heads above water, from the flirting teenagers to their worried parents to the little girl next to me in the shallow end, who plopped down on her swim diaper and splashed me with hopefully non-urine water. She and I giggled at each other all the same.
Andrew Taylor-Troutman is the author of the book with Wipf and Stock Publishers titled This Is the Day: A Year of Observing Unofficial Holidays about Ampersands, Bobbleheads, Buttons, Cousins, Hairball Awareness, Humbugs, Serendipity, Star Wars, Teenagers, Tenderness, Walking to School, Yo-Yos, and More. He lives in Chapel Hill, North Carolina where he is a student of joy.
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