This is a parenting page, about parenting Page. I am a child psychologist and a mother. So I specialize in children, yet I am human, thus I am full of knowledge and yet as full of emotions as any other parent. So I decided to write this Parenting Page since it might be informative and funny for others to take an insider look at a child specialist raising her child. I also wanted to create a way to show Page when she grows up, if she chooses to have children, a real-life view of the experience.
Sports & Fashion
In elementary school Page had the same response when being asked if she wanted to join a soccer team or a basketball team: “Why would I do that?! The outfits are not pretty!”
Oh. Well there’s an angle I hadn’t thought of.
She went on to explain that she liked being on the swim team because you get to wear bathing suits which are attractive, she liked running because you could buy pretty running clothes, and she liked karate because the gi (i.e., karate uniform) looked really cool.
So as a parent I had to ask myself, “Is this criterion upon which I should allow her to make a decision about sports?” It seemed pretty flimsy as criteria. But it is true to her personality. From preschool she was designing and making clothes for her dolls, creating pop-up books, and designing and building doll houses for which she also made furniture (to scale!) and characters to live in the houses. At age six she made her father a doll house with a working elevator. She would draw dress designs and piece together material scraps to design dresses for herself. At age eight she had her first dress design used as a pattern by a seamstress (grandma) to make her a dress. She was so proud when her dress design became a real dress!
So how does any of this relate to sports? It is that when I let my mind wander I realized this is perfect criteria upon which to decide upon sports if I am allowing her to be herself and follow her internal motivators. She is an artist and a designer; she sees the world visually and that motivates her. She is intrinsically motivated by visual stimulation and an internal drive to create from visual inspiration whether that is clothes or buildings. And intrinsic/internal motivation is of far more worth than any external motivation I could try to provide. In the end I decided in a time when parents lament about not being able to get kids up and moving and away from the computer or iPad or whatever, I should be thrilled Page is highly active and swims, runs, and has taken karate. As long as she exercises and is active I am not going to try to push her into activities that for whatever reason she doesn’t like. Which doesn’t mean not nudging her into exercise… I did take note of her internal motivators and started talking her language; I suggested tennis. Those outfits can rock!
Dr. Tina Lepage is the owner of Lepage Associates Solution-Based Psychological & Psychiatric Services, a group practice in S. Durham/RTP. She lives in Chapel Hill with her husband, daughter, and two dogs. www.lepageassociates.com. You can find her on Twitter at @LepageAssoc or at Facebook.com/LepageAssociates.
Related Stories
‹

Days After Historic Rain, Chapel Hill and Durham Under Another Flash Flood WarningMany areas of Orange County, Chatham County and the rest of central North Carolina are again under a flash flood warning on Wednesday.

PHOTOS: 'No Kings' Rallies in Orange County, Durham Draw ThousandsJoining in with "No Kings" rallies across the country on Saturday, many Orange and Durham County community members took part in local protests.

Chapel Hill Police Identify, Charge Third in High-Speed Chase and Shooting From JanuaryChapel Hill Police delivered 17 charges stemming from the Jan. 25 shooting to 19-year-old Maurice Keys as he was held in Durham County.

Photo Gallery: Winter Storm Drops Several Inches of Snow on Orange, Durham CountiesWednesday's winter storm left behind several inches of snow in Orange and Durham Counties. Check out our local photo gallery!

Durham Police Arrest 2 Teenagers For Shooting at Trooper, Car Chase in Orange CountyTwo teenagers arrested in Durham face a litany of charges after a multi-agency investigation stemming from an incident in Chapel Hill.

NCDOT Dedicates I-40, 15-501 Exchange in Durham to Honor Former Rep. David PriceThe exchange of I-40 and U.S. 15-501 is now dedicated to the retired David Price, who is known for his transportation advocacy in Congress.

Power Outages Continue for Chapel Hill, Durham Residents; Police Share Road Closure UpdatesUPDATE: In the wake of a severe storm, many residents in Chapel Hill and Durham remained without power on Wednesday morning, and local emergency services and governments continued to provide closure information and safety tips. Durham County, which energy provider Duke Energy said was one of the hardest-hit areas in North Carolina from high winds, […]

Chapel Hill Given 'Huge Shock' by Potential Redesign of U.S. 15-501 ExchangeLast week, the Department of Transportation sent the Town of Chapel Hill a concept design to change U.S. 15-501 exchange with Interstate 40.

Orange County Animal Services Urges Caution After Canine Flu Cases in Chapel Hill, DurhamThe Triangle community is largely still recovering from the last few years of dealing with changes to society caused by COVID-19. But recently, some organizations are going through new changes due to a different sickness — specifically, around dogs. Cases of canine influenza have been locally reported, causing animal professionals to issue caution to dog […]

Widespread AT&T Outage in Orange and Durham Counties Still OngoingAT&T internet and television customers in parts of Orange and Durham County have been without service since around 10 p.m. Thursday night. AT&T described the source of the outage as a “fiber equipment failure” on its website. It posted a timeframe of 24-48 hours until restoration at the time of the outage on Thursday night. […]
›
Comments on Chapelboro are moderated according to our Community Guidelines